3:30 a.m. conversation.

Me: I discovered a new skill I have!
Scott: And you're going to tell me about it.
Me: Yes I am. I can guess the ages of any of the women pictured in the wedding part of the Styles section. Within a year! It's uncanny!
Scott: Wow, that's lame.
Me: It would only be lame if I weren't married.
Scott: Because then it would be some kind of spinster exercise.
Me: Anyway, I discovered that the women are kind of hard to read, but the trick is to look at the man in the picture. Unless the guy is like obviously wealthy, the older he looks, the older she probably is.
Scott: Why didn't you just guess the guy's age?
Me: I don't know. But what I'm trying to tell you here is, you're dragging me down.
Scott: I could have told you that.
Me: So as soon as you fall asleep, I'm going to be combing some Just for Men into your hair.
Scott: Go crazy.

Me: You know what I just realized? I'm twice as old as I was when I was eighteen. I'm eighteen times two.
Scott: You're Doubly Legal. And that's my second favorite magazine.

Comments

[Mir]

Hahahahahaha. You are doubly fabulous, Alice... and Scott is doubly funny. ;)

[NEB]

Hee hee. But the real question is- can you guess their WEIGHT(s) accurate to within 2 lbs or something?

[Nothing But Bonfires]

I can always tell where they're from. Right down to the town in Connecticut.

[Courtney]

That's awesome. At least he knows that he is dragging you down :-)

what a great conversation. It doubly made my morning!

[Deana]

Hey, you can get a job at the carnival!

I met my husband when I was 18. I'm now 38. The other night he aked, "So, how old was your mom when I met you?" Think think think...18+21...39. One year older than I am now. I HATE you. He thinks he's soooo funny.

[Eulallia]

Can spinster exercises work my abs? They sound more fun than crunches.

[Tree]

So, what the heck are you doing up at 3:30am?

[Michelle]

Ridiculous conversations in bed are probably one of the best things about a long-time relationship. My husband and I have had long, less-than-meaningful conversations on whether or not his butt is the center of the universe and whether or not I have one or two eyebrows.

[Elizabeth]

From now on if I need to reveal my age I'll just say 19x2. It sounds so much younger!

"Doubly Legal" is his SECOND favorite magazine, that is too funny.

[schmutzie]

You's the bees knees, F-slippy.

I'm "doubly sweet". 16x2, that is.

[Em]

I was sort of shocked when I realized I was 12 years from 17 and in 12 years I will be 41. Not that that is old but just WHERE DOES THE TIME GO? Gah.

[clickmom]

My husband went prematurely gray at 20, and every one thinks he is about 15 or 20 years older than me. He is 4 years older than me. I like the gray, wouldn't touch it, don't let the men feel too confident, it is not good for their already overinflated egos. Also, my Dad used some hair thing for men for years (grecian formula maybe?) and 1. it smells and 2. it turned his hair an unnaturally dark gray and not an actual hair color. blech--

[tortoiseshelly]

I, too, am a fan of the late-night/early morning bed conversations. Even bigger fan of the conversation with a talkative dreamer.

Not such a big fan of the active dreamer karate-chopping me across the neck in an effort to save me from "the tornado headed towards our car" or scarring my leg for life with the sharp toenail in an effort to "kick the alligators away."

Hope neither of you have suffered any injuries yet. Seems like tinting Scott's hair at 3:30 a.m. may come dangerously close.

[M&Co.]

Did you really have a conversation with your husband at 3:30 A.M. and he didn't club you?

[alice]

Do you advocate wife-clubbing? Is that what they do, where you live?

[Helen]

wow....I am so impressed with you and your blog, not to mention your marriage! Imagine, a) having a conversation with husband b) having that conversation at 3am-ish c) having a husband with hair, grey or not d) all this and so young, I have the key to the door, twice ( and a half) 43. Old and without funny night time chats with hursuit husband, life is looking dreary suddenly.

[Melissa]

Yeah, I'm 37 and just finished grad school. The age thing kinda got to me sometimes, when I'd see some cute undergrad and think "Oh, yeah, he's half my age. Damn!"

[cagey]

I don't what is funnier - the fact that you are having such a conversation with your hubby at such a silly hour OR the conversation itself! LOL

[lis]

Hee hee hee... "doubly legal." hee!

ahhh. Yeah that one had me crying a little tear. Thank you, Alice. Or Scott, I guess.

[Candice]

Yay for useless talents! Motherhood brings out all kinds of em!

[Kathryn, The Daring One]

De-lurking to say, ha ha ha and have you read

[Kathryn, The Daring One]

I guess maybe you do not allow html on your site.

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2003/07/14openletter.html

I just love those late night conversations but mine are never quite that funny when I blog them.

http://daringyoungmom.blogspot.com/2005/09/lasternight-we-lost-our-minds.html

[ozma]

Ha ha...job at carnival.

Can you guess the wealth of the man by the ugly-pretty ratio? That the richer the guy the prettier she is to his ugly--this is not infallible but it's statistically significant. As far as age goes, I always noticed that things get sparse after 36 in terms of who gets married except for those few exceptions they throw in there to show they aren't prejudiced.

My only obsession with the Style section is a career obsession and thank God we are too busy to read the Sunday Times now because the insecurity was eating me alive, i.e., my realization I'm a total loser. And I had my wedding thingie in there. With a picture. To my everlasting shame.

Which is why I love this guy:

http://nytimesweddings.blogspot.com/

[Belinda]

Ah...when I was 36 (by a mere 4 days), I gave birth to my first child. So you're ahead of me in the "young mom" race. I've now just turned 39. Which means that, when MY mother was my age, I was a sophomore in COLLEGE. Yee-Haw. Nothing like perspective.

[Kitty]

And just as you had me actually thinking you're really old, you go and ruin it all by admitting that you're not.

[MFA Mama]

LMAO...and to think, our 3:30 a.m. conversations over here usually involve someone hyperventilating...be FUNNY...why didn't I think of that?

[tortoiseshelly]

Nope. Not an advocate for wife-clubbing, just making sure neither of you suffer the ill consequences of spicy food before bedtime. :)

[M&Co.]

I get really cranky when I am awakened at that ungodly hour. There WAS a reason the Husband took all the night feedings. And no, no one usually gets clubbed in my house, except in my mind, sometimes.

[alice]

No, no, we were both awake! Him from caffeine, me from craziness.

[Unique Baby Gifts]

You guys are a crack up! I wished you lived close by so we could meet for cocktails!

[alice]

Is that your first name, Unique? Or do you go by Baby?